Well… it’s been awhile. I am so bored right now. Wait­ing for art files so I can do some work.

My life has been very stressful.

I don’t even know where to begin. I guess not work­ing as much as I would like is stress­ful, then add hav­ing anoth­er baby with no health insur­ance, would add to that. Add to that a par­ent who com­plains about mon­ey (with a small degree of being right) does­n’t help any.

My birth­day is com­ing up, but with me being so stressed, I don’t know how I am going to enjoy it. I hate doing the finances, but Amy does­n’t like to do them either, and some­one has to. I hate that we have no mon­ey. I want to pay of my card, car, get a big­ger home that is on land I own, get a new wash­er and dry­er, a new fridge, stove and enter­tain­ment cen­ter. A nice sec­tion­al would be nice too.

I want to start up col­lege funds for the kids and retire­ment funds for Amy and I, but with­out mon­ey, that is impos­si­ble to do. I feel like I am in this sink­ing hole and I just can’t out.

Food would be nice too. I can’t remem­ber the last time our fridge and cup­boards were stocked with food. It always seems there is noth­ing to eat. And since Amy has been feel­ing sick and not feel­ing like cook­ing din­ner, her usu­al knack of mak­ing some­thing out of noth­ing, isn’t happening.

I am so depressed all the time. I have learned how to keep up a hap­py appear­ance, but even Amy can see through that. I love how she assure me every­thing will be alright, but late­ly that has­n’t helped.

I just need a mir­a­cle. or a job.

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